


Curse Your Sudden But Inevitable Betrayal!

by DoubleXXCross



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (Video Games)
Genre: Gen, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-13
Updated: 2015-03-13
Packaged: 2018-03-17 17:33:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3538112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoubleXXCross/pseuds/DoubleXXCross
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not gonna work out. It's never worked out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Curse Your Sudden But Inevitable Betrayal!

He glares down at the object in his hands. The latest in the long line of canned evils he's unearthed.  
  
It's not gonna work out. It's never worked out.  
  
It's. Never. Worked out.  
  
Seriously. It's happened so often he's been able to draw a regular pattern:  
  
>One: find some kind of ancient sealed power.  
>Two: attempt to control said ancient sealed power.  
>Three: lose control of said ancient sealed power.  
  
Step three is what he's currently dreading. Step three usually means having to team up with that blasted hedgehog and his friends in order to stop the evil that's bigger than he is.  
  
Step three usually means having to act like a. Gasp.  _Hero_.  
  
The thought of it virtually makes his skin crawl.  
  
He's  _evil_! Every inch of him is  _evil_! He knows it's cartoonish to admit, but. But he's  _evil_!  
  
His lair is  _evil_. His minions are  _evil_. His goddamn sandwich that he made for lunch today is  _evil_.  
  
He's practically allergic to heroism. And it doesn't matter how  _evil_  this plan is gonna start out as, he's gonna lose control of this guy and it's gonna end up in him having to be  _heroic_  for a 'change'.  
  
(Like it counts as a 'change' anymore with how often he's done this.)  
  
It's not worth it. It's gonna happen. He knows it's going to happen. It always happens. And it's not worth it.  
  
...But he's short on cash.  
  
The profession of "World Conqueror" is an expensive one, you know. Robots don't build themselves and parts certainly don't spring up out of nowhere.  
  
He's shut down three factories just this month. Couldn't even fill them with toxic waste to create a new death trap for his enemy to spend more than ten minutes on - couldn't afford to leave the machines.  
  
He wouldn't have to spend months pouring over the design specifications or the construction plans or the programming for this guy.  
  
It doesn't have a spot so specifically weak it can be hit a grand total of three times for massive damage.  
  
And anyway, Sonic beats robots  _all the time_.  
  
Like, almost literally. He's gotten thirty notifications in the past three minutes. For units that were stretched across twenty miles. Because this is just the thing that Sonic  _does_.  
  
Supposedly, people are afraid of things they don't understand. Everybody understands that Doctor Eggman deploys robots. Similarly, everybody understands that Sonic destroys those robots.  
  
On the other hand, each one of these things he digs out of the ground is just different enough to be a total riot.  
  
There will at least be decent mayhem? Maybe he'll destroy something big again. Like the moon. Or the planet. Or all of time and space (that day was a good day).  
  
And heck, maybe - just  _maybe_  - with all those experiences he's had in the past, he's finally learned how to keep the whole mess from getting out of hand.  
  
At the very least, he's prepared for the inevitable.

**Author's Note:**

> A bizarre fill I left on a Livejournal comment once.


End file.
